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July 8, 2007 by Andrea Nierenberg

Small Talk, Big Deal

eHow has a nice little guide to making small talk:

Step  One                               

Practice. Converse with everyone you come across: cashiers, waiters,
people you’re in line with, neighbors, co-workers and kids.

Step two

Chat with
folks unlike yourself, from seniors to teens to tourists.            

Read everything: cookbooks, newspapers, magazines, reviews, product
inserts, maps, signs and catalogs. Everything is a source of
information that can be discussed.
      

Step  Three

Force yourself to get into small talk situations, like doctors’ waiting
rooms, cocktail parties and office meetings. Accept invitations, or
host your own gathering.
                           

Step  Four

Immerse yourself in culture, both high and low. Television, music,
sports, fashion, art and poetry are great sources of chat. If you can’t
stand Shakespeare, that too is a good topic for talk.
                         

Step  Five

Keep a journal. Write down funny stories you hear, beautiful things you
see, quotes, observations, shopping lists and calls you made. That
story of the long-distance operator misunderstanding you could become
an opening line.                         

Step  Six                            

Talk to yourself in the mirror. Make a random list of topics and see
what you have to say on the subjects. Baseball, Russia, butter,
hip-hop, shoes … the more varied your list, the better.

Step  Seven      

Expand your horizons. Go home a new way. Try sushi. Play pinball. Go
online. Paint a watercolor. Bake a pie. Try something new every day.

Step  Eight

Be a better listener. Did your boss just say she suffers from
migraines? Did your doctor just have twins? These are opportunities for
making small talk.

Step Nine

Work on confidence, overcoming shyness and any feelings of stage
fright. Remember, the more you know, the more you know you can talk
about.
                           

                        
               
                Tips & Warnings 
               
                   

 

                   
                  

  • Be yourself. Keep in mind that confidence and humor are superb
    substitutes for comedic genius or wit.
  • Remember, you never have to do it alone.
  • Keep a few exit lines in mind too. For example, "Thanks for the
    wonderful chat, but I must make believe I’m interested in everybody
    else. Tee hee."
  • Keep your fellow chatterers in mind; naughty stories and loose language
    will be frowned upon in many circles. By the same token, your French
    quips and scientific discourses will be wasted on some.

               
               

Filed Under: General

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